What’s Past is Prologue

Four months, a New Year, a family visit, three vacations, a promotion and a bonus, fancy restaurants and coffee shops, a feDSCN3522w thousand dollars short, 15 pounds lesser and 2 sizes smaller, new friends, a music class, a new phone, 1000+ pictures, and 25 revisions has lead to this moment: a cup of coffee – a fancy peanut butter latte! – two cups of English Breakfast tea, a butter croissant, a Pandora One subscription and the decision to decisively break the silence and write.

It has been too long. A lot has happened in that time and if I do not say it all soon I might never get to eternalizing it on my blog, which has become the only holder of a written account of my life. Or at least those parts I wish to share with the internet.

20140422_184827Where do I begin? Work? Yes, that journey is nearing three years (come June) and it has proven to me what I am capable of. My job title was recently altered to be ‘Senior Engineer’ owingDSCN3154 to two promotions in two and a half years. It’s a rather ego boosting position to be in when most people wait at least four years to get here. Receiving the highest possible rating two years in a row did not make me wonder what I was doing so spectacularly because I have no idea how to do it otherwise. I am not boasting here, that’s me being humble and very honest. When you love what you do, wherever it is, there is no possibility of you giving it less than your all, is there? You just do it because it is the only way you know how to do it. It’s not a choice. There is now the conscious blanket of the need to deliver. It isn’t pressure, just a more visible position that makes me feel that if I stumble way too may people are going to notice so I cannot afford to make any mistakes. Or if I do, I need to be able to get over it smoothly. That said, I really enjoy where I am now. Working and living life the way I’ve really wanted to.

I rang in the New Year with my parents as we traveled down the east coast. While most of our time was spent in the state of NewThe Golden Gate Bridge York, we managed to have a well overdue family vacation, enjoy the frigid cold of my beloved city of Chicago, and re-bond. It gave the rest of my family cause to worry because my parents approved of and delighted in my lifestyle (see previous posts regarding marriage eligibility, family honor, blah blah) but that has been relegated (finally!) to the zone of, “Mind your own beeswax, please”. Hopefully that stays where it is and I can move on! Traveling. Yes, that bug has caught up with me. I have been to New York City twice this year, watched Placido Domingo perform live, seen the wonders of a frozen Niagara Falls, thoroughly enjoyed the Polar Vortex because moaning about it wasn’t going to make it go away and usher in the sun, crossed the Golden Gate Bridge, walked an average of 10 miles a day for 7 days in San Francisco and NYC, and have resolved to continue to explore Chicago through food, tea/coffee shops and books.

20140430_204541The one thing I have always maintained, with arrogant resilience, is that I know my own mind better than anyone else. This ought to be true of every person. If you don’t know yourself, well… I’m not sure. I like having my own identity, weirdness and normalcy combined to form an exclusive being. As you grow up, you do pick up traits from others but you make them your own. The past 27 years of living and observing has taught me that an uncertain and unthinking mind only leads unnecessary troubles later, as has been repeatedly proven by members of my own family who have, and are still, dealing with their digressions and half-opened cans of worms with no closure in sight.

The past defines us, yes, but it only provides us with a skeleton upon which we place a bit from the moment we are currently living in. The past is prologue.

 

 

[Most of the past four months can be depicted in pictures – http://instagram.com/srutsam]

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