Musically Confessed

I believe now I can proudly say that my time has been fruitfully employed. After the bout of feeling righteously bored to the very bone, rejuvenation happened and I am myself once again. The thinking process has begun and a whole new plot came to mind, the writing process is under execution as I managed to type out an entire chapter for the novel idea, and the reading process is in full steam as I delve into the works of Austen, Bronte, Hemingway and even Shakespeare. Sigh I feel so much better now. I even got to watch Jane Eyre, not sure which version of it though, on the History Channel this morning and I was once again completely fascinated with…well, everything!! Realizing that Sean Bean who plays Boromir, brother of Faramir, is the same person as Sharpe and that cute guy the camera kept panning to during every Sheffield United match was one of the highlights of watching the History Channel (which airs Sharpe during the nights and is pretty good).

I found my little piano yesterday. The one with just 29 keys that my Dad got for me when I was a baby (must’ve been a few months old). I still have it, yes. I never got a bigger one, no. But I love this little instrument and I used to compose short pieces on it, playing with just one hand. I do not know how to read music, the notes. I tried to learn it but something never struck even when during my short stint in the school orchestra playing the tuba. And eventually I forgot what I had learned in those few weeks. So I had to make do (with what I’d done before) rely on my ear. I’m not boasting off or anything, but I do have an ear for music. For tone. Certain sounds (musical only) stay with me and I find myself humming them a lot. Some of those would be Bolero (music played during the credits of the movie Moulin Rouge), the NCIS theme song, the Hungarian Rhapsody (featured in ‘The Cat Concerto’ episode of Tom & Jerry), What Child Is This?, the main theme of Pirates of the Caribbean, Pippin’s Song (from Lord of the Ring: Return of the King), The Shire (Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring). There a lot many more musical pieces that just kind of stuck with me, in my head. Based on this I tried to play them out on my very trustworthy piano (a 20 year old Casio kids’ play thing) and I could!! I’ve been doing this since I started listening to music (which would be more twenty years if you counted my Dad playing songs in my ear when I was a baby and if not then since the age of five when I started attending Carnatic music classes.) I would just pull out the piano and play something. Then I started playing by ear, fingering the keys based on a sound that I hear and I could actually do it quite well. It was fun really. Of course the restriction offered by the 29 keys and single hand play did confine me, but I just enjoyed it. I never gave up that habit. My longing to learn how to play an instrument, a piano specifically, I had to shelve. Either there was never a teacher who was good enough or the place was to far away or timings would clash with my other classes (dance and music). It was pissing off and I remember having this huge argument with my parents some ten years ago about it. My dad, with his ever young heart, also has a passion to learn to play the guitar. And though he too is bestowed with an ear for music he never got more than strumming on my cousin’s guitar (which presently is collecting cobwebs after a week’s use some six years ago).

Anyway, though I never learned to play an instrument and still aspire to (‘cause I don’t think it’s ever too late to learn something new), I managed to retain my affliction for music in general. Listening to a new song once or twice would have me belting out the tune perfectly (inclusive, sometimes, of the tenor and, if I can manage the low notes, alto) if I happen to like the tune of it. The underlying music is what catches the ear. The melody of it. Thus in recent times, I even manage to play parts of the rock music I am accustomed to. I might not do it as well as most others might, but for my own amusement I can get the tone correct. I do the karaoke thing sometimes and even my grandpa (who normally prefers only the melodies songs in any language, opera music included) stops and listens to me sing. LOL Not that my singing is bad or anything but it is kind of disconcerting to have people standing outside the door (or window, which my darling uncle once did), and secretly listening to you singing!!

I’m determined to take piano classes. I want to play Bach and Mozart’s symphonies as best as I can. The music’s there in my head, resounding in my ears. I write with utmost feeling that I feel terribly helpless that I can’t hear myself playing them. That one dream of mine that has not yet been fulfilled. Maybe the only dream that I have held onto for so long because nothing else has lasted through the tides and turns of my life .